Tuesday, November 21, 2023


Hello happy Tuesday. I've lived like a month in the last 2 days it feels like.  

This morning was rough and I cried a few times already. Probably going to cry again. 
When I got here MIL was agitated and she just kept getting worse. She kept saying open the door so she could leave. I asked her what door I should open and she said all of them lol. After some meds she has changed from the mean Blanche as we call her to the nicer one we are calling Alice. I swear she has multiple personalities. But now I'm watching her hallucinate. She was just holding up her tissue box and I was like do you want me to do something with this? She said I was trying to give food to that girl.  Someone is coming at some point today to give her a sponge bath. I'm sure Mr in charge will show up right before. I'm going to leave and go get a coffee or something when he gets here. I need a break already and it's only 9:30.

Yesterday I decided this coat rack had to move. I scared myself like 4 times walking by it lol.  I put it in the master bedroom no one goes into.

So yesterday my brother in law showed up right before the hospice lady came. She got here and I was trying to go over the meds with her and she kept looking at him and asking if he gave her stuff. I was like he has not been here. Eventually she got it. Then he was telling her how he was going to put a lock box outside so they could let themselves in when no one was here. She was like? I said she can't be left alone right? She says NO! Someone should be here 24/7. He still put up a lock box though. I told him later when we were having a discussion he could actually go to jail for leaving her home alone, that it is elder abuse. He doesn't believe me still. 

When I was going to get my diaper changing lesson he started to walk out the door to the garage and I was like you don't want to stay around for the lesson? He said I got it yesterday JULIE. I was like oh well I didn't know that. Should have been like well I guess I could have called you to come do it. The diaper change took forever and it's really hard with only one person (still haven't tried it myself yet). Scott and I did it last night before I left and he did it himself this morning he said. 

He comes in after the hospice gal left and say I just want to tell you thank you. I was like OMG like I really appreciate that! And then he says I know you don't like me and I don't like you. I was like Uh I never said (to him I'm always pretty cordial to him) and then I was like can I ask you why you don't like me? He said well I always take control. I was like I take control? Like when did I ever take control? He said like right when Suzie died you went looking for her wallet. I was like??? I was helping you find her ID and stuff since you were looking for it! She had just shown us where she kept her bank statements and stuff so I was showing him so he could get the stuff he needed. What a fucking asshole. And then he said and I like got in the middle with Michele for them to fight and I said I don't even know you're fighting. I said the only thing I've ever told Michele about you is answer questions when she asked. He probably didn't like that I told her the truth lol. Anyhow, we seemed to end on a good note but nice to even be able to defend myself for whatever crap they were dreaming up about me. I told him all I've ever done here is be nice to his parents and I'm not here for the money. I have my own money and my stuff is worth more than anything in this house lol. I think he probably thinks I'm like him a money grubber, you know, cuz if you are one you think everyone else thinks like you.

After Scott got home (well his mom's home) we talked for a little bit. I got dinner from the drive through and then went home to my animals. TG for animals even though they drive me nuts 1/2 the time. 

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Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Oh Julie this is a lot on your plate. This BIL sounds like a doozy. I'm so sorry. I know that morphine will cause hallucinations. Especially if too much. I hope you can have a nice calm thanksgiving. Family!!

Anonymous said...

Feel so sorry for you going through this. The anesthetic that she had for the surgery actually makes dementia worse so I'm sorry to say it will very all downhill from here. I'm pleased she at least has you and Scott. Big Hugs xx

Anonymous said...

Sorry I should have put my name. I've been reading your blog for years but first time commenting. I'm Gillian from New Zealand. Went through all this with my Mum a few years back and it's extremely hard.

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